unlearning; dissociation

It’s so tricky to put into words. Some things are better felt, as to use words reduces their intention, sensation or meaning; putting it into a neatly-defined box dulls the essence.

When we speak of unlearning, what we are pointing to is this idea of forgetting the programmes.

Every piece of information is programming that creates distance between us and our inner sense of knowing.

Think of all the ways that we have been separated from our true nature. We spend time indoors, wrapped in clothes, removing hair, repressing our inner desires, separating our feet from ground. Add in that we spend most of our formal learning reading books, listening to information, being online, wrapped up in technology and other peoples’ opinions, lives and experiences.

Everything consumes our attention so we have little to no time to dedicate to processing how we really feel, unearthed, beneath it all.

Part of the growing experience of humans involves a huge amount of dissociation from nature.

An underlying, unconscious desire to separate our felt sense of be-ing.

We are consistently taught as children (and beyond) to ignore what the body tells us, and instead rely on rules and guidelines creating on illusive ideas of time, human conditioning (memes) and money.

There are the obvious patterns of dissociation; being told to not say or do something, because it’s not the done thing, or won’t look right. To be seen, not heard. And not to look a certain way. Then there’s the patterns regarding the most basic life-supporting act; eating. We are told to eat at certain times regardless of whether we are hungry, because it’s breakfast/lunch/dinner time, or we have been allocated a break at work/school. We’re told to finish a meal we don’t even like, so we can be rewarded by a sweet treat after. We go to jobs that don’t fulfil us to earn an income. Advised what to wear, how to wear it, how our appearance should be. Is it any wonder teenagers are rebellious? Their whole lives they’ve been put in clothes that do not express their unique identity. These are the simple everyday things.

Add into play the effects of social media; filters, staged photos, purchased followers and constant judgement or instant gratification. And the overall picture clearly shows we are focusing on anything, except our very basic (yet hugely important) normal bodily functions and feelings.

We are in a complete state of dissociation.

Most people are unaware of how they truly feel. Because they have not been given permission to settle and feel. And some of us are so out of sync, that pain is the first experience of feeling into our bodies. How many of us take time to feel into our low back, feet or hips on a regular basis? Yet, the body never lies and it holds so much intelligence.

Naturally, when we try to do something that doesn’t sit right, the body will say it by some element of contraction or constriction. A tightening of fist or jaw in anger, a bead of sweat in fear, the breath pace will change, our posture will adjust, we curl in fear, shield ourselves when under attack.

The body never lies. Yet we are unaware of how we really feel. We are so dependent on what we’ve been taught and educated; all the ways to ignore our intuition, that we’ve forgotten how to be.

So, unlearning (to us) is discarding the programmes. Attempting to drop the facades and illusions of what, where or how we should be, the magnetism of all the distraction. Instead settling into the deeper levels and being okay with acknowledging what is truth to us, and what no longer resonates.

Because most habitual human patterns create separation from our nature.

Our own unique nature; how best to eat, express and be supported in our own ideas, values and ethics.

And nature beyond; that we are animals, earth, we don’t know more than we know (why are we here, where did we start, is there a power larger than us at play etc.).

We listened to a beautiful interview with an astronaut the other day and she put it beautifully:

‘When you’re out there in space, there are no boundaries. You really see the interconnectedness of it all’

She went on to explain that you realise the smallness of it all. And yet the extreme vastness too.

This life is the only one we’ll get. So, don’t waste time looking outwards. Spend more time looking inward and supporting and nourishing eachother.

**this year it's not like we'll be holding a monthly intention and then letting it go. they will merge into eachother, so we will return to the themes throughout the months and chew on the information slow to see how it shifts. some will make no sense. but there's opportunity there for unlearnings**